This post involved a transmogrifier.

1 Jan

I am writing the post you are about to read on January 5, 2008. It will sit quietly wherever wordpress puts it until January 1, 2009: my future and your present. I hope you’re impressed. My intention is to have my 2007 self tell my 2008 self what went down in 2008 CE while my older and wiser 2009 self smugly looks on. Here we go.

So, who is president?
Well, both teams were weary and wary of drivel, so they made smart choices: Obama and McCain. The debates were like a bucket of ice water on a long hot day. Oh, right, and Obama won. The world went nuts. He’s not out yet but nobody’s paying any attention to Bush.

How much does gas cost? A gallon of milk?
Oh, come on. That’s boring.

Um, what’s your deal then?
I am still single. It remains doubtful that I will ever find someone who appreciates me as much as I do. Tragically, I am still dogless but, forward projection, 2009 will be the year of the dog. My white patch has become more pronounced.

The professional version?
I successfully graduated about two weeks ago. I don’t have a job, yet, but I’ve sent my resumes at least a dozen places. I spent a lot of time designing it, time I should have spent job hunting. I’m ready to get the hell out of here. Anywhere. The job outlook is pretty good. Just waiting for the offers to start pouring in…

How about some highlights?
At some point Whitney compromised my camera. I don’t like to think about that now, as it still has that new camera smell, but it is inevitable.

I tripped in public and drew blood. It wasn’t pretty but I was due.

I farted in a professional setting and got caught.

My car finally died on me. I beat the hell out of it with a collapsible plastic snow shovel before its final tow to the junkyard. Now I am limping along without wheels.

I ordered a vodka martini straight-up-on-the-rocks while wearing a dress. And a false mustache.

I made five new friends but sweet baby jay I miss the ones I already have. Not once did I dance with David and that hurts so bad. I just want to lounge around in charming pjs at Darcy‘s place and eat snacks. But I am so out of cash for domestic travel.

You know? The highlight reel is pretty short. It was kind of a year to hunker down. Bring on 2009 already. Is that a shitty attitude to have on the fifth day of 2008?


One Response to “This post involved a transmogrifier.”

  1. wb001i 01/1/09 at 4:50 pm #

    My post is missing. I think it might have gotten lost when I migrated from The (Aged) Cheese Rind to The Cheese Rind. It’s disappointing.

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